When I was looking for a spouse, I made a top 10 list of characteristics. I’ll totally admit that “physical attraction” is important to me; it was on that list for sure. But it wasn’t even close to the top. My top priority was to find a woman who loves God — someone with whom I could spend my life serving God.

Now before you think too highly of me, let me eat a little humble pie — that list came about by trial and error. I had to learn from experience how to make priorities that honor God when it comes to me and women. But I hope you get it right the first time. In the video, Gary Thomas has some really great advice for Christians who are looking for love.

There’s nothing wrong with wanting to marry someone you find attractive. God hard-wired us that way. But what if the secret to being happy in marriage is not to marry for happiness? For Christ-followers, the reasons for marriage must go beyond that tingling sensation that shoots down the spine. A Christian marriage is one that prioritizes Jesus and his Kingdom above everything else:

“But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.” (Matthew 6:33, ESV)

Are you looking for a person with whom you could serve Jesus anywhere, no matter the cost?

Are you already married? If so, how could you become more intentional about keeping Jesus the center of your marriage?

updated August 2019

Photo Credit: Nathan Walker