There are few things more beautiful on a person than confidence. Women who wear it radiate strength, passion and conviction. It contributes more to a look than a designer label or the perfect diamond. When a woman knows who she is, why she is, and what she’s supposed to do, she may be dressed in thrift store specials and be absolutely gorgeous.
A confident woman is not afraid to be herself. Whether she is plain, simple, and beautiful or flamboyant and fabulous, the key is that she knows who she is. She understands her purpose and her gifts. She knows that there are certain things only she can contribute to this world, at this time, in this place.
She knows her style. It doesn’t matter whether she prefers zebra stripes and pink fur, or to be cloaked in grays and subtle greens. Whether she likes volleyball or Victorian teas. Shopping or hiking. Or all of the above. What is most important is that she is herself.
That means stretching and stepping out. So if you’re supposed to be on the front lines, be there. Don’t step back. If you are blessed with supportive skills, be the best supporter you can be. Expand your skills. Celebrate the talents and experiences God has blessed you with.
What is Your Confidence Based On?
“All of your real value and worth is built in by design,” says Denis Waitley in Timing is Everything. “You received it as a precious present when God gave you the gift of life. That gift — all of what’s in you — is really all the value you’ll ever need. It isn’t a matter of finding value, earning value, or proving value. It’s a matter of living up to the value built in at the beginning.”
When we know our value in our very bones, it is manifested as self-esteem. It springs up from within, inspiring us to live into the generous calling on our lives.>
Confidence radiates from a deep center — from knowing that you are valuable. And when you know you're valuable in God’s sight, you can approach Him with confidence. It is an attitude, yes, but not one that is based on your own achievements. It is rooted in self-esteem, yet confidence comes from knowing that God is all-powerful, all-knowing, ever-present, loving and just.
Self-confidence is no confidence at all. To achieve anything or take any action consistent with God’s plan for your life, you must first surrender yourself, and place your confidence in God, knowing that He works all things for good to those who love Him. But that doesn’t mean you don’t have the power to act. In fact, we are called to act in order to reflect God’s glory.
A Picture of Confidence
A confident woman’s being speaks louder than her words. Confidence is not loud or boastful. In fact, it is often gentle, quiet, and humble. And inevitably powerful. Someone who has a message to share with the world, who makes a difference: now that’s confidence!
How do you talk about yourself? Are you the first to put yourself down? Our words have power — either to build us up or break us down. What you say about yourself usually becomes true.
Start listening to your self-talk. Do you ever demean yourself by saying things like, “stupid,” “wimp,” or “coward?” Stop immediately and replace it with positive statements. Jesus was clear about His worth and made emphatic statements about who He was: I am the Bread of Life. I am the True Vine. I am the Way and the Truth and the Life.
How do you speak about your body parts? Can you imagine Jesus complaining about fat toes or big hips or a long chin? He never said anything negative about himself. He understood that His body was merely an earthly vessel — something necessary to function here on earth.
Has anyone ever said anything that hurt you deeply? Bring these hurtful words to the cross, to Jesus. He wants us to be confident and whole, not scarred.
Clothes and Confidence
Confidence is not clothes or a haircut or expensive jewelry, it’s an attitude. At the same time, something that makes you feel fabulous may do wonders as an accessory to your confidence.
Look at Yourself
What do you communicate to the world, even when you’re not saying a word? What does your posture and the way you present yourself declare to those who see you?
Now, look inside. Ask Jesus to clear away any cobwebs, whether sin, hurt or misunderstandings.
When do you most feel like the woman God created you to be? Capture that feeling, bottle it, preserve it. And whenever you need a reminder, dab a few moments confidently on your wrists.
Not everyone feels confident all the time. When in need, act your way into feeling. Chin up, shoulders back, tummy tucked. Now breathe in… and smile. Imagine yourself as a princess wearing an exquisite gown with a precious crown placed on your head. That’s who you are, after all. You are a daughter of the King. Now act like it.
Read more about our new identity in Christ here.