It masquerades as communication but leads us to polarization. It elevates our need to convince others above our need for truth. We are warned it “ruins” all who participate in it. Yet in our culture, especially through social media, it has risen to new heights. Quarreling.
Quarrelling differs from discussion. Respectful discussion stems from a desire to discern the truth. Quarrels originate from a desire to get what we want (James 4:1-2). We use words to prove we’re right. We’re the smart ones, the ones who should be listened to. Once we start quarreling, our positions harden. We push others into corners while backing into our own. Love and respect disintegrates in the process, whether in our families, in politics or in the church.
Paul warns us not to quarrel. He says we are to extend kindness and gentleness toward those who disagree with us. He knew “foolish and stupid arguments” that lead to quarreling would never win someone to the cause of Christ. When the world sees Christ-followers fighting each other, we lose the war. We forget the real enemy of our souls.
The Church may be imperfect, divided and battered. But the Apostles’ Creed declares we believe in the Church as we believe in God the Father, Jesus Christ and the Holy Spirit. Let’s not separate ourselves by indulging in senseless quarrels. Instead, let’s do all we can to foster unity and love. We may be running out of time.
Jesus, thank you for giving us the great opportunity to be a part of your body. Forgive us when we treat others in ways we wouldn’t want to be treated. Help us grow in loving people the way you do.
Throughout the Day: When negative thoughts enter your mind about someone, ask Jesus to help you turn it around. Then replace those negatives with something positive.
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