Lower Your Expectations

The label of “Grumpy Old Man” is one that I seek to vigorously avoid as I reach my golden years. No one enjoys being around people like that as they tend to bring down the level of conversation wherever they go. Sadly, I find myself drawn to this type of behavior even though I desperately try not to.

In Matthew 7 Jesus shares some thoughts around the dangers of comparison or judging others. He uses a familiar metaphor of a woodshop where a speck of sawdust would be a major irritation, something his hearers would easily understand.

The problem with comparisons is that they are based on high expectations placed on others while not holding yourself accountable to the same expectations. Comparisons based on unequal standards will inevitably lead to the absence of joy as it is impossible to feel positive self-worth at the expense of someone else. A wise person told me years ago that the things that annoy you most in others are likely behavioral traits you also tend to display. In other words, you will find more joy in your life by simply lowering your expectations of others, not expecting them to behave in ways you think they should, based on your own ideas of correct behavior.

Sounds simple, doesn’t it? Like other spiritual disciplines, however, it requires the power of the Holy Spirit and a constant reliance on God to bring about the change in behavior. At the same time, Jesus’ words recorded in Matthew 7 should bring you hope. He understood human behavioral tendencies at their basest form as our creator. Surely, the Spirit can help us when we are at the end of our own strength. Paul reminds us of this in Romans 8:26 when he writes, “In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans.”

Heavenly Father, I desire to be the kind of person you created me to be, full of the joy of the Lord that is evident to others. Help me stop comparing myself to others and allow you to mold me into your loving child.

Throughout this day: As thoughts of comparing yourself to others enter your mind today, ask God to take them away, taking every thought captive in obedience to Him.