GO BIG OR GO HOME

“Go big or go home.” A phrase that has been a part of the American English lexicon for thirty years at least, but an idea which has been around much longer. It’s the idea that if you are going to do something, you should do it to the fullest extent; if you won’t, you might as well not even do it at all.

I think Simon Peter lived by this principle even though the phrase probably didn’t exist during his lifetime. So much of what we see him do in the Bible is done with this all-or-nothing attitude. When Jesus is arrested in the garden of Gethsemane, Peter is 100% dedicated to defending him, pulling out his sword and slicing off a soldier’s ear. Yet only hours later, he is denying he ever knew Jesus and hiding in shame. Moderation is not a concept he seems to understand.

Honestly, I can relate, which I think is why Peter is my favorite disciple. When it comes to my faith, I go big or go home, even though moderation might sometimes be the wiser course. In 2009, I was teaching at a Christian high school, and I went on a mission trip to Malawi with some other teachers and students. I had never even left North America, yet here I was flying all the way to southeastern Africa, to a small country I hadn’t even heard of before planning for this trip, all because I had prayed to God to use me for His glory. And yes, in my mind and heart, I was asking for Him to use me in a big way.

Basically, I was asking Jesus to command me to walk to him on water.

Just like Simon Peter, I was eagerly asking to join Jesus in his miracles, and just like he did with Peter, Jesus said, “Okay, come on out.” There were a thousand reasons to be afraid of going to Malawi, but I brushed them all off and stepped out in faith. And for the first few steps, it was smooth sailing—or rather, walking.

Then I got a very serious illnessvirus (that may or may not have been malaria).

Lying in a dirty, humid third-world hospital with a dangerously high fever, I found myself heavily regretting getting out of my comfortable boat. Just like Peter, I “became frightened, and… cried out, ‘Lord, save me!’” (Matthew 14:30) Worst-case scenarios played out in my head: What if I died? I couldn’t even contact my mom to say goodbye. I regretted going big, and I wished I could go home.

Once he was on those waves, Peter probably felt the same, thinking the next time he could go all or nothing, he might choose nothing. “Jesus immediately reached out his hand and caught him, saying to him, ‘You of little faith, why did you doubt?’” (Matthew 14:31) In much the same way, he pulled me out of the waves of my illness in Malawi—a round of antimalarial treatment and I was back on my feet—and I saw that I had no need to doubt. I was never out of his protection; my fear just told me I was and I let that weigh me down.

It’s okay to take a risk and go big for God, because he is faithful to his promises. And when challenges arise, ignore that fearful voice telling you to “go home.” Just keep your eyes on Jesus and keep walking—one step at a time, one foot in front of the other.

Lord, give me the courage to go big for you. Help me to step out in faith when you call me, and to keep my eyes on you while I walk on the waves, so that I may be a part of the work you are doing here on earth.

Throughout This Day: Look for opportunities to take a step towards Jesus, and be open to the Spirit’s guidance. Listen to “Oceans (Where Feet May Fail)” by Hillsong United

to reflect more on walking on water with the Lord.