Meeting Men in Chat Rooms

I met this guy on a chat room on Valentine’s day this year. He is six years older than me (I am 15 years old). We got to know each other really well and we progressed to talking on the phone. We have now fallen in love with each other. We are meeting next Valentine’s Day, we have it all arranged to perfection. I can hardly wait. A friend of mine thinks it’s a mistake to meet him. What do you think?

There are several things that bother me about what you have said. First, to really be in love you have to spend time with the person and know a whole lot about him (like how he reacts when he gets a flat tire on the freeway, when he gets fired from a job, when you wreck his new car). It takes time together to know those things.

Second, your guy says that he is 21. There is no way from knowing that for sure, unless you know someone who knows him or his family. I don’t want to burst your bubble, but I’m working with a client who is 15 and first met a guy on the internet . They arranged a meeting in person where he proceeded to rape her. It turned out he was older than what he said; he is now in jail.

Third, right now I think you may be in love with the idea of being in love. Be careful and don’t do this secretly. Let your parents know what is going on. I want you to be safe and protected.

Dr. Ginger

Dr. Ginger Gabriel, Ph.D., M.F.T., is an author and speaker as well as a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in California. With Master of Arts degrees in counseling and missions and a Ph.D. in psychology, she has traveled to Asia, the Middle East and throughout North American giving her four-to fifteen-hour relationship and counseling skill-building seminars.

Her favorite pastimes are kayaking, quilting, hiking and reading novels. She is married to Dr. Stan Gabriel. They have three children and three grandchildren.

Tags: advice, computers, dating, dr. ginger, ginger gabriel, internet, relationships

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