by Vonette Bright

**Would you like to know God personally? We have mentors available that would love to help you. http://thelife.com/interactive/ask.html

Angie turned the television off, sat back and thought about what she heard.

She had been listening to one of her favorite talk show hosts. The entertainer denied Jesus is the only path to reconciliation and fellowship with God.

Angie picked up her Bible and wondered, “Were there other ways to Heaven?”

She discovered Acts chapter four, which speaks about Jesus Christ. It says, “There is salvation in no one else!  God has given no other Name under heaven by which we must be saved.”

[To be “saved” means to be rescued or delivered from our wrongdoings, our sin.]
Angie believed the truth of the Bible.  Jesus IS the way!  The ONLY way.

Dear friend, test the claims of those who say they know the way to God.  

You can trust the Bible to always speak the definitive truth.

~Lord, please help me to model Your grace and acceptance to others who believe differently than I do. Help me to stand on the truth of Your word and to speak it in love. In Jesus’ name I pray, amen.

Question: How can you show Jesus’ love to someone who doesn’t know Him today?

About the Author:  http://talk.thelife.com/experience/devotionalforwomen/authors/vonette

Experience Chat Landing

Barbara Erochina is a rambunctious 20something with a love for non-fiction, quality vegetarian fare and the pursuit of truth. Her dreams consist of warm fuzzy things, communities in need of love, and relationships that scream authenticity. She loves to write creatively, and hopes to grow into someone creative with writerly tendencies. Contact her here.

Barbara Major Bryden is a freelance writer in Olympia, WA. She received a degree in Biblical Literature from Northwest University in Kirkland, WA. Her true inspirational stories, book reviews, and poems appear in books and church take-home papers. For the last five years she has published Journeys in Prayer, a monthly publication with readers in all parts of the world. Contact her here.

By Dr. Bruce Gordon

I am sitting in a hotel lobby writing these words. The atmosphere is one of dark paneled wood, comfortable lounge chairs and a view you would die for, looking out over a river sparkling with diamonds from the afternoon sun.

At one end of the room over the fireplace hangs a picture of the Canadian Fathers at Confederation. The 34 men seem peaceful with no computers or Blackberries; I feel almost out of place with my computer and Blackberry buzzing on the table, as if I am violating their calm with my technology to allow me to do 10 things at the same time. Life must have been easier for those 34; I know that is not true from reading our history, for they had significant challenges and conflict which had led up to this famous session.

The difference was the speed of information and this rocket-like pace is now the order of the day and we are well beyond busy. If I do not have 10 balls in the air at once, I must not be accomplishing much, or so I think; that is a mind trap, which is false and keeps me crazy busy.

So, I write these words, more to myself than to you the reader; that being said, if they help, you are welcome to them. Here are what I refer to as my Seven Mind Traps That Keep Me Crazy Busy.

1. We need to be wanted and needed and thus must be available at all times through our cells and email.

It is really a trap of wanting to please people; do you struggle with this? Understanding and acknowledging this trap is really half the battle. I am working through this and asking the question, “Who is in charge?” If it is a severe issue, then you may be struggling with an approval addiction. Look it up on the web, for there are great resources to help.

2. We say yes to too many things and lose focus on that which is best; the enemy of the best is the good.

Some of us are wired to say yes to almost everything, “Yes, I can take that on between 2 and 3 am.” Others are much more selective. I would like to counsel you to clearly understand your style ( there are many great Assessment Profiles available to you ). Again, self awareness is a major step to addressing this trap. I am currently in the process of handing off a role which I enjoy and have the skills for; the reality is that it is a good thing for me to do, but not the best. Understanding my strengths and leadership style is a must for me to make this decision. Remember, your strengths can become weaknesses.

3. We over commit or allow others to over commit us.

Over committing and under delivering is a trap which will have disastrous consequences for you. I don’t care if you as the reader are responsible for 1000’s of staff or 3 children ( which may feel like a 1000 staff to you ), you need to be able to control the commitments you take on. This goes back to my #2. Practice the word NO; stand in front of the mirror and say NO; did it hurt; did the mirror suddenly fall off the wall. Of course, it again means having clear priorities and also understanding what season of life you are currently in. That is probably another article, but I believe that we go through seasons of life and these seasons bring different responsibilities. You cannot compare yourself to another person who is in a different season of life from you.

4. Our technology runs us; we do run our technology.

The fact that I have not turned off my Blackberry as I write this article in this gorgeous calm setting reinforces my trap #4.

I have a good friend, who I believe has found a way to address this trap. He disciplines himself not to check emails or voice mail from Friday evening to Sunday evening. Not a bad strategy; I am attempting to practice this and when I slip up, I don’t beat myself up, but rather get back on the “wagon”.

5. Being busy means that we must be accomplishing more than others; it really is an issue of insecurity.

Some authors have called it a status symbol. What are your insecurities? It may help you to be honest here. You don’t need to report back to me, just to yourself.

I just consulted with a leadership team, who is struggling with this trap. I suggested that they use a “storyboard” approach. It means going on the offense by writing the story they would like to see for themselves and their organization 3-5 years in the future. It is to be no more than 2 pages. I am already receiving feedback on the positives on this strategy. The result will be that this team will establish the key priorities for them to address; as others come up, they will be measured against this new template. Actually this process works well for individuals as well and it addresses the other traps which I have mentioned. Try it!

6. Running fast becomes an escape, for it means that we do not have the time to focus on those issues which cause pain.

My wife and I are a speaker couple for the Family Life Marriage Weekends ( you can learn more about them from website ). We see this in life after life as couples come and share their pain with us. Many men confess to me that they have poured themselves into their career to compensate for the dysfunction of their marriage. If this is hitting a sore spot for you, then seek out help. My experience is that as you leave this unattended, it will become worse; if you need additional resources contact us at ….

7. We live our lives in the future; once I accomplish this, then I can slow down.

I have lived my life in the future. Early in my career, I often would think and at times verbalize, “when I ….. I will…. Now on this side of 50, I realize how wrong I was, for I did not take time to enjoy that season of life. I would ask you to seriously consider what season of life you are in. I know I mentioned this in # 3, but it bears repeating. Ask yourself 4 questions:

-how would I define this season of my life
-what will the next season look like
-what are the traps which I need to avoid in this season
-what can I do now to properly prepare for the next season

Well, there you have my 7 traps; maybe you were too busy to even read them and skimmed to this last paragraph. In the painting of Confederation, there are 2 men out of the 34 who have arms crossed with scowls on their faces; what is going through their minds; were they to be the ones which John A MacDonald would need to convince. The Nation does not rest on you; but then again, your future effectiveness does and perhaps survival.

Forms: /bgordon

Watch the video.

Every couple fights at some point. How you handle those conflicts will have a huge effect on your marriage. You can improve your marriage relationship by learning how to have good fights!

“Patterns in how couples fight can predict their likelihood of divorce with up to 90% accuracy.”
~ Dr. John Gottman, University of Washington

“How you argue, especially how you end an argument, can determine the long term success or failure of your relationship.”
~ Dr. Phil, Professional Psychologist

How couples resolve marital conflicts in their marriage is crucial in maintaining a healthy relationship. A good channel of communication and an effort to understand and accept each other is the key.

FamilyLife speaker couple Greg and Shelley Leith join Dr. Dave Currie in this episode of Marriage Uncensored to share their insights on how to successfully resolve marital conflicts. Don’t miss out on how you can improve your marriage relationship by learning how to have good fights!

Watch the video clip.

For more resources or to get the full discussion on this topic, visit www.MarriageUncensored.com

Is your marriage full of conflict? If this is something you would like prayer for or if you would like to correspond with one of our e-mail mentors about it, we would like to hear from you. Click here to e-mail us about it.

By David & Claudia Arp M.S.S.W.

Have you ever been accused of not listening? As hard as we try to listen, we’re afraid that at times we’re both guilty of not listening. Not listening plays a big part in problem marriages. Counselors hear over and over again statements like: “He never listens to me.” or “She doesn’t understand how I feel.”

If poor listening is a sign of a troubled marriage, then good listening is a characteristic of a healthy marriage. When others say, “Hey, tell me more!” and really listen to us, we feel important, understood, and accepted.

Good listening improves relationships. Here’s an action point for you. Determine today to improve your listening I.Q. Remember these tips:

1. Empathize; don’t criticize. Unsolicited advice may be considered criticism!
2. Give your mate full attention when he or she is talking. Often when our mate is talking, we’re either thinking about what we’re going to say next or we’re paying attention to something else, like preparing
   dinner or watching TV.
3. Listen for feelings, but don’t judge them. They are simply how your mate feels. That’s valuable information for you. Don’t say, “You can’t feel that way!” Instead, mirror back, “Did I understand, is this how you feel?. . .”
4. Don’t interrupt, You’ll get your turn. And you can listen best with your mouth closed.

Remember, practice makes perfect. Plan the time in your schedule today to listen to the one you love.

For more information on enriching your relationships, visit Family Life or check out up coming Family Life conferences:
American Schedule

More Relationships:

Are you using guilt as a weapon?

Looking for love in all the wrong places

Ten ways to make love last

~ David and Claudia Arp, MSW, founders of Marriage Alive Seminars, are marriage educators, columnists and authors of numerous books and small group video curriculum including The Second Half of Marriage and 10 Great Dates (Zondervan) Website: www.marriagealive.com

For upcoming Marriage Alive events visit Marriage Alive

I met this guy on a chat room on Valentine’s day this year. He is six years older than me (I am 15 years old). We got to know each other really well and we progressed to talking on the phone. We have now fallen in love with each other. We are meeting next Valentine’s Day, we have it all arranged to perfection. I can hardly wait. A friend of mine thinks it’s a mistake to meet him. What do you think?

There are several things that bother me about what you have said. First, to really be in love you have to spend time with the person and know a whole lot about him (like how he reacts when he gets a flat tire on the freeway, when he gets fired from a job, when you wreck his new car. It takes time together to know those things. Second, your guy says that he is 21. There is no way from knowing that for sure, unles you know someone who knows him or his family. I don’t want to burst your bubble, but I’m working with a client who is 15 and first met a guy on the internet . They arranged a meeting in person where he proceeded to rape her. It turned out he was older than what he said, he is now in jail. Third, right now I think you may be in love with the idea of being in love. Be careful and don’t do this secretly. Let your parents know what is going on. I want you to be safe and protected. Dr. Ginger

Dr. Ginger Gabriel, Ph.D., M.F.T., is an author and speaker as well as a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in California. With Master of Arts degrees in counseling and missions and a Ph.D. in psychology, she has traveled to Asia, the Middle East and throughout North American giving her four-to fifteen-hour relationship and counseling skill-building seminars.

Her favorite pastimes are kayaking, quilting, hiking and reading novels. She is married to Dr. Stan Gabriel. They have three children and three grandchildren.

by Sheryl Soukotta As a single woman it’s easy for me to feel all alone even in a crowded room of many other singles. But I’m determined not to let it get the better of me. There’s more to life than men, and by focusing on those other things, I’m maximizing my life as a single woman. Here are my suggestions for living that life. 1. Know who you are - One of my favorite verses is in Zephaniah 3:17 which says, “He will take great delight in you, He will quiet you with His love, He will rejoice over you with singing.” When we get a picture of just how precious we are to God, we can’t help but enjoy life. Life is worth living because He is worth living for. When we get to the “I should be married by now” stage, it’s easy to compare ourselves to others. But God created you uniquely and He has given you specific gifts that you can use to touch other people’s lives. Don’t wait for God to bring a man into your life to “complete” you. You are already complete if you are a child of God. You are single today because He wants you to be. There are some things in life that you can only accomplish in this particular season of life. When God called Moses to speak to Pharaoh about releasing the Israelites from slavery in Egypt, He asked Moses to use what was already in his hand, his staff. He didn’t ask Moses to use something he didn’t have. What’s in your hand? What are your strengths? What are the special gifts that God has given you that you could use today to bless somebody? 2. Have a great support network - “No man (or woman) is an island.” I never realized how much I needed good, supportive friends until my recent breakup with my boyfriend. God has brought some wonderful people into my life, all of whom play different roles. I have an accountability friend who keeps me on track by asking me the hard questions, I have a ministry friend who plays a role similar to mine in her church, and I have many friends with whom I can just have fun and be myself. I also have a couple of close guy friends. Our relationships are so secure that we know there will never be anything more to our friendship; they are “safe” guys. I have found it helpful to understand a male’s perspective on many things I may be dealing with in my life. 3. Have fun - This year on Valentine’s Day, my roommates and I decided we would have a girls’ night at our place for all our single friends. We had a lot of fun making the invitations (so much fun that I’ve found a new hobby of making cards!) and planning the menu, decorations and so on. Of course, we all still have “down” days and we have to allow yourself to go through them. But don’t stay there. Watching soppy love movies or reading romance novels doesn’t help, so stay away from those. Here are some things you could do instead: * Have a girls’ night * Enjoy a regular “pamper yourself” day * Find a hobby * Aim to meet one new person every week * Travel * Attend a women’s conference * Get some exercise. Give your hand a go at different things if you’re unsure of your place in God’s kingdom. Look for opportunities to serve people and to serve God. In the meantime, if God happens to bring alongside you someone who seems to be running at the same pace and direction as you, that’s awesome! But if not, keep serving anyway. The Bible says that when we get to heaven we will have to give an account for what we did with our time, so let’s make the most of every day.